family
2022 Continues to Be Okay I Guess
I didn’t mean to leave you hanging this long. My apologies. In my last post I said I’d come down with “something” that may or may not have been COVID.
Long story short, I don’t know if it was COVID but it only lasted a week or so and I feel fine now. I did end up finding a way to get tested, though. The kid’s school has a deal with some testing sites and he and I went to one, waited three hours, and got a swab shoved into our nostrils so far it came out our ears.
No, not really. It just felt like it. Of course, I went first to show him it was no big deal. He was very brave, especially after the first nostril. We got ice cream after, as you do.
We both tested negative, so who knows? He did end up up getting sick too and lost his sense of taste and smell for a couple days, which seemed like COVID to me. But again, he tested negative so we’ll never really know I guess.
We’re both fully vaxxed, by the way. If we did have COVID, I’ll assume that’s why we didn’t have more serious symptoms. I’m must glad it wasn’t more serious no matter the reason.
Since then, we’ve avoided any more sickness at the house and Summer is a month away. Fingers crossed we make it without further incident. The kid continues to wear a mask at school, even though it’s not “mandatory” anymore.
Removing the mask mandate was yet another fucking stupid decision on the part of our government, but I’lll try to keep my rants to a minimum this week. No promises, though.
Let’s just say I’m still not impressed with the way our governments, Federal, State and local, have handled the pandemic. We’re just lucky it wasn’t much worse. Of course, tell that to the families and friends of all the people who’ve died from COVID. They’re probably not too impressed either.
And as if we didn’t have enough problems, it looks like man-child Elon Musk is buying Twitter. I’m sure he’ll make it a much better place to socialize. Yeah, no doubt in my mind whatsoever. Yeah . . .
In unrelated news I’ve started to explore alternatives to Twitter. So far, I’ve landed at Micro.blog. I’m @ChrisU on there, just like on Twitter, so I should be easy to find. You may want to check it out.
I’m also making The Flickcast podcast every week with my pal Joe Dilworth. It’s going great and still fun, so I plan to continue doing it until people tell me to fuck off. So far, so good.
Finally, I’ve started drawing and painting again. I was inspired by my friend Dave Caolo, some books I saw on Urban Sketching and the Urban Sketching World website. Basically, you go to a place (city street, cool building, wherever) and sketch/draw it with pen and ink and then add some color with watercolor paint.
It’s really been fun, even though I’m not very good at it (and that’s being kind). Still, art of any kind is wonderful. It’s also great therapy and allows you to free your mind and not think about horrible shit all the time. Not that I do that.
I only think about horrible shit the appropriate amount of time.
Okay. I’ll try not to make the time between posts so long from now on. I know you all miss me when I’m gone too long.
Oh, that’s one of my drawings at the top of this post. It’s a photo of it from my sketchbook. Yes, I have a sketchbook. I’m an artist now, don’t you know.
It’s not the worst I’ve done and I don’t hate it, so that’s something. I’ll keep at it.
Okay. Gotta go. Until next time, be kind to each other.
The Family Way
It’s been awhile. Yes, I know, you’ve missed me. I get it. I’ve missed you too. We used to have a pretty good relationship. And then I went and messed it up by not being around for, what, almost a year? Sorry about that.
It doesn’t really seem like its been that long. But time flies. Oh yes it does. In case you’ve forgotten what’s happened recently, here’s a bit of a refresher. I left LA/California and now live in Austin, TX. I’m a father. It’s a boy. He’s three. I’m semi-retired and stay home with him, which basically makes me a stay-at-home dad.
I love my life. I do, however, sometimes miss work. It was fun (mostly) and I’ll probably do it again one of these days. But I can’t complain, my kid is awesome and I get to watch him grow up every day. I’m very fortunate to be able to do that.
Also, I still do a podcast called The Flickcast with Joe Dilworth, my awesome co-host. And I take photographs, make things from wood and occasionally write. That pretty much catches us up.
Well, there is one other (pretty big) thing that’s happened since we last got together. As some of you may know, I’m adopted. Both of my adoptive parents are no longer alive and I miss them every day. I especially miss them when I want to ask parenting questions, but pretty much the rest of the time too.
I realize I’m far from perfect, but I think they did a pretty good job with me considering how much of a pain I was growing up. Spoiled only child and all that. Yes, I was quite the troublemaker. But in the end, I think I turned out okay. I only hope I can do the job half as well as they did. I’ll keep working on it.
But that’s not the big news. This big news is I’ve found my biological mother. Well, actually, H found her. H is good with stuff like that. But found she is and contact we have had. Quite a bit, actually. She’s great and we’ve discussed all sorts of things.
I’ve been to see her twice so far and plan on going again soon. I’m looking forward to it. But wait, as Steve Jobs used to say, there’s one more thing (at least). I’ve also got a brother and sister. And a niece. I know, right? A whole new family I never knew about.
I’ve spent time with my new Bro and Sis too. They’re terrific people and I look forward to getting to know them more. Actually, my sister, her husband and their daughter (the niece I mentioned) just visited us. And yes, a good time was had by all.
Just when I think life can’t get any better . . .
Go East Young(ish) Man
You know the old saying “Be careful what you wish for?” Well, I’m experiencing a bit of that now.
Fortunately, what I wished for in this case is pretty cool, so the fact it’s going to come true isn’t really a bad thing. Actually, it’s a really good thing.
I could go on like this for a bit longer, being all cryptic and such, but many of you will start to wonder “What the hell is he talking about?” or even begin to wander off and look for shiny objects. So, I won’t keep you in suspense any longer: I am leaving the Los Angeles/Orange County Metroplex and moving to Austin.
Yes, that’s right, the one in Texas. H got a great work opportunity, and I can do what I do from almost anywhere with an Internet connection, so we’re packing up our crap in a giant truck and heading East. Well, in truth, movers will be packing our crap in a giant truck.
I don’t rent a U-Haul and move myself anymore. Those days are in the past, along with my healthy back.
And what about Max, you may wonder? How does he feel about the pending change of address? Well, he doesn’t really get a vote. But if he did, I’m sure he’d agree this is a great opportunity for the family and be all for it.
But like I said, he doesn’t get a vote. He’s just a baby, after all. That would be silly.
As for me, I’m excited about this new adventure and the possibilities it brings. I’m also excited about potentialy having a bit more space. Don’t get me wrong, I like our current house. It’s just a bit close to the neighbors for my taste.
So, we will be looking for a new place in Austin with a bit more land around it. Who knows, we may even end up in the country? Could happen. But don’t tell H, I’m not sure she would go for it.
Being born and raised in California, I will miss a lot of things about “The Golden State.” But the truth is, there’s also a lot of things I won’t miss. I also know Austin and Texas aren’t perfect either and will likley have their fair share of annoyances.
But that’s okay. I like a challenge and I’m ready for it. And no, I won’t be buying cowboy boots or a ten gallon hat.
Well, maybe a hat.
Happy Christmas and Merry New Year
For most of you, today is Christmas. For some others, it’s just a Thursday. For that first group, I hope you get everything you asked for this year, and one or two things you didn’t.
After all, what fun would it be if you just got everything you asked for. You gotta have a few surprises in life. Christmas is a great time for surprises.
I didn’t ask for too much this year and I was lucky enough to get everything on my list. The truth is, though, all I really wanted was for my family to be healthy and happy, especially our youngest member. His health and happiness is my first priority. I guess I must have been pretty good in 2014 because I’m happy to report he’s doing great.
Sure, 2014 had a few rough spots (very rough, let’s face it) but those times haven’t dampened my enthusiasm, or my optimism, for 2015. In short, I’m looking forward to the new year and all it will bring.
Until the new year, though, I’m going to pass the time enjoying a few of my favorite holiday movies. I’ll give you a couple guesses what some of those might be. You can also hear Joe and I discuss our favorite holiday movies, and whatnot, on the latest episode of The Flickcast.
Happy Christmas and best wishes for a spectacular 2015!
Don’t worry, I’m not only watching action movies during the holidays. This one has almost no action at all, except the bedroom kind. Plus, it has Rick from The Walking Dead and Hans Gruber from Die Hard. That’s gotta count for something.
The Saga Continues
It amuses me when people post to their personal websites/blogs that they are not, in fact, dead. I’ve even done it myself. Probably more than once. Hey, here it is again: I’m not dead.
See, that wasn’t so bad.
The truth it I’ve been in a bit of a funk and haven’t had the motivation to write anything. I’ve been a bit down. A little on the low side. Bummed out. Sad, even. Why, you ask?
Well, I’ll tell you. It’s not my death that’s the problem, it’s my mom’s. Yes, you read that right, my mom passed away. It’s actually been a couple months now and I’ve had a bit of time to try to get used to it.
But if I’m being completely honest, I’m really not used to it . . . and I don’t think I ever will be. I think that’s okay though. I don’t think you’re supposed to get used to it or get over it.
You just learn to live with it.
On that note I’ve been trying to think of a fitting tribute to my mom and, perhaps, write something here that will do her justice. So far, I’ve pretty much failed.
What I can do is tell a story.
It was 1979 and the movie version of one of my favorite TV series, Star Trek, was finally coming to the big screen. It was called Star Trek: The Motion Picture and it would open on that Friday in December to mediocre reviews and somewhat disappointing box office.
But STtMP’s relative success is not really the point of this particular trip into the past.
The point is my mom let me skip school on that Friday, drove me to the theater and waited in line with me from the early morning until we were finally seated and where, in spite of the reviews, I had a great movie-going experience.
That’s the kind of mom she was.
Sure, some could argue allowing your child to skip school to see a movie isn’t the best example of parenting. But that doesn’t really matter. What matters is she encouraged me … in whatever direction I wanted to go.
Even if she didn’t exactly understand, or share, my passions, she helped me figure out ways to indulge and pursue them. She was always there for me whenever I needed her and whenever I wanted to try something new. No judgements, few questions, just support and love.
Even when I made mistakes, she was there for me. That happened quite a bit, as it does when you’re growing up. But with her help I learned from those mistakes and became better for it.
These are the things a parent does. It’s what my mom did. I would not be who I am today without her. I only hope I end up being half the parent she was.
It’s a lot to live up to.
A Second First Father's Day
Last year, around this time, I waxed sentimental about the loss of my own father and how I was very much looking forward to, finally, becoming a father myself. Now that my son is here, and has been for nine months, I feel I’ve gained some insight into what it really means to be a father and also some idea of what my own father went through with me.
Unfortunately, I’m too tired to tell you about all that right now. But here’s the gist: fatherhood is the most amazing and most terrifying thing I’ve ever done.
I can’t believe I waited this long to do it, but I’m so glad I did. I got the exact kid I was supposed to get (if you believe in that sort of thing) and watching him grow up and experience all life has to offer (and helping guide him on his journey) is a privilege I will treasure always. I will also try very hard not to screw it up.
So Happy Father’s Day to all the dads, but especially to mine. I get it now Dad. Thank you.
A New Episode of The Flickcast
As I’ve been busy doing things (taking care of a baby, for example), I’ve been neglecting other responsibilities, like this site. Well, only for a week or so. Still, I want you to know I care.
I do. Just not right this minute. Or, more to the point, just not all that much right this minute. You know, busy. Like I said.
However, I do care about at least one thing right at this moment: a new episode of The Flickcast. That’s right, another week has gone bye and there’s a brand new episode. See if you can guess from the pic above what Joe and I might be talking about. Not for the entire episode, mind you, but a chunk of it to be sure.
Give it a listen, why don’t you? And if you’re feeling saucy, feel free to tell a friend or two how much you liked it. That would be nice of you.
And don’t worry, I’ll be back here with even more caring, insightful (and all that other stuff) writing very soon. I just can’t get enough.
'Lord of the Crumbs'
Let’s just say for the record that I love Sesame Street. I also love Lord of the Rings, both in book and movie form. I even have the extended version of the films on Blu-ray. Don’t judge.
I can’t wait to share them all with Max when he’s old enough. I know he’s gonna love them all too. Sesame Street, in particular, taught me so much when I was a kid and it’s still going strong today.
Naturally, when two of my favorite things get together, as they do in this parody video called Lord of the Crumbs (starting everyone’s favorite cookie-fanatic), I need to watch and bring it to your attention. This video has everything you could want in a Sesame Street parody video, including cookies. Lots of cookies.
And really, who doesn’t love cookies?
[youtube www.youtube.com/watch
Busy, Busy, Busy
I wanted to illustrate just how busy I’ve been recently by having not one, but three “busy” titles for this missive. So yeah, I’ve been busy.
That’s not to say that most of you don’t lead busy lives as well, I’m sure you do. It’s that I don’t know most of you personally so I can’t really speak with any authority on the subject, now can I?
I can speak with some authority or myself, however. So yeah, I’ve been busy. Been working on the house, working on other projects, working in general and also preparing for the arrival of Project M.
I’ve also realized that this time I have now to do things is going to be far less very soon. With the arrival of Project M imminent, I can foresee quite a bit of my time being taken up dealing with the day-to-day duties of being a father. No, I don’t mind at all. In fact, I’m really looking forward to it.
Of course, that doesn’t mean I won’t, occasionally, miss having time to do other things. Free time will just have to be regulated a bit more from now on, that’s all. When you’ve lived your life a certain way for as many years as I have, a very large change like this will certainly cause one to rethink one’s priorities.
Fortunately for all concerned, I’m a very evolved human being and will have no trouble making this important transition. Well, fingers crossed anyway.
Let’s switch gears now and talk about another subject I’ve become acquainted with recently: Home Improvement. Fortunately, I’ve got some background in things of this type having done a bit of construction as a young man as well as having spent several years as a Grip on film and TV sets.
Sure, that doesn’t mean I’m ready to add a room onto the house (it doesn’t actually need one, truth be told) but I do feel I know my way around a screwdriver, hammer and various other power tools.
That also brings me to a subject I’m very excited about: Tools. I think every home owner (well, almost every one anyway) should have a set of basic tools for doing things around the house. I have a decent set of tools I’ve accumulated over the years and also have many of the ones my Father left for me. Others have been broken, borrowed or otherwise lost over the years.
Consequently, my tool kit is a bit lacking in some areas. So, of course, that means I get to buy new tools. I’m enjoying that quite a bit.
Once I put the kit full together, I’ll post it here so you can see what I feel comprises an essential tool kit. Until then, try to get some fun outta life, you know?
Christmas Aftermath
In a nutshell, I’m tired. Christmas has come and gone and it was a long, long day. And we don’t have any kids and didn’t have to fly anywhere.
I can’t imagine how my parents did it or, for that matter, how other parents do it today. it must be exhausting, especially if you have to travel a long way and keep some young ones entertained.
As for us, we had a very nice time with H’s parents, her brother and my Mom. Just the six of us in the comfortable environs of Ventura eating lots of food and opening a metric crapload of gifts.
We may have even had one or two drinks too. Good times all around.
Out of the many, many gifts, we all got some really nice stuff. I will probably even keep the vast majority of my gifts. . . Probably. Nah, they were all great. I’m keeping ‘em.
That’s a pic of our tree. Pretty nice, huh? I think so.
Hope you all had a very good day. Now, to the nap chamber!
Merry Christmas
We are about to hit the road and head to H’s parents' house to celebrate Christmas. Naturally, we’re taking a few gifts.
And yes, even though I didn’t ask for anything, one or two of these are for me. Have a great Christmas everyone.
A Few Words About Loss
I don’t want this post to turn into anything overly maudlin or depressing, but given recent events, I just wanted to say a few words about loss. I will try not to kill your buzz too much.
For the most part, I’ve been very fortunate in my life. I almost always get to work with great people, have a lot of good friends and caring people in my life, work on interesting and fun projects and generally speaking, up until recently, I’ve never had to experience any type of loss of a family member, friend or other generally catastrophic event.
Then, a few years ago, my father died.
A month later, one of my best fiends since childhood died. Then, I got divorced and had to completely change my living arrangements, how I viewed and lived my life and my feelings about the future. Two months ago my favorite Aunt died followed, this week, by my favorite Uncle.
But wait, there’s more. During the time my father was ill and around the time my childhood best friend died, I also had a brief period where I thought I was sick. This is something almost nobody knows.
In the end, it turned out to be nothing. But let me tell you, the time between when you first discover something and the Doctor tells you it’s nothing can seem like a fucking eternity.
I don’t recommend it.
My Uncle dying this week has brought to the surface a lot of feelings about death and loss. The sad fact is we’re all going to die someday. I hope for all of us that day is a long, long, long time from now. However, we just don’t really know.
This time two days ago my Uncle was planning a vacation with his family. He had gotten a diagnosis of Leukemia last year but it had responded to treatment and he was doing well. Then, he got sick. At first, it seemed like a cold but it got progressively worse. 48 hours later he was gone.
This is the part where I roll out the chestnuts and tell you that every moment of life is important. I don’t care if countless people have said it before, and better. Doesn’t make it any less important.
So, for those of you who still need to hear it (and the rest of you who think you don’t) here it is:
Make the most out of life because you never know how long you, or your loved ones, have. In other words, life is short. Get it? Good.
I know I promised not to be overly maudlin or depressing, so I’m trying to end on a high note. The good news is most of us will have a lot of years to live our lives to the fullest and every day is a new chance to do something great and wonderful for yourself, for others and to live your life to the fullest. Take that chance and run with it.
See, that wasn’t so bad.
Christmas Birthday 101
The holidays are upon us in earnest and Christmas is coming this Sunday. I’m also having a birthday this week too. In fact, it’s tomorrow (Thursday).
Before you feel too bad for me and express sympathies that my birthday must get forgotten due to its proximity to Christmas, I will make you feel better by telling you that in all the time I’ve been alive, I’ve never felt bad about having a birthday three days before Christmas.
There’s one reason for that (well, two). Harold and Dorothy. My parents.
My parents came into my life sorta late in theirs. They tried for several years to have a kid the old fashioned way, but in the end, for whatever reason, they were unsucessful. So, like countless others who wanted a child, but just couldn’t make it happen, they turned to adoption.
That’s where I came into the picture. My parents adopted me, sealed the deal in late November, I was born on December 22 and they brought me home to live with them on Christmas day.
Since that time, my parents, being the intelligent and thoughtful people they are, went to great effort to distinguish my birthday from Christmas. It was always considered a seperate day and talk of Christmas was put aside until it was over.
Sure, the house usually already had Christmas lights and decorations up (my father was like that), but that was not allowed to detract from my birthday. If my party was at the house, we celebrated in a room away from the tree and as much of the rest of the Christmas-centric decor as we could manage.
They were also really great at making sure I had separate birthday and Christmas gifts each year. My mom still does that to this day.
I have no doubt that when I see her this weekend she will make me open my birthday presents first and then make me wait for the Christmas presents until a respectable amount of time has passed. Somewhat of a traditionalist is Dorothy. If my dad were still alive, I’m sure he’d insist on the same thing.
The purpose of this missive is to say that I’ve been very fortunate to have these two people in my life. Whatever happened, they always put me first and made sure I never needed or wanted for anything.
I could not have asked for better people to show me the whys and wherefores of life. I just hope, if I ever have children of my own, I can do half as good a job as they did.
It’s a tough act to follow.